Indifference

I’ll never leave you.
You’re unlike anyone else.

I’ll wait forever for you.
I’m coming back.
Never leaving your side.
This is as special as you.
Be in my life forever.

I bought it for you,
I’d never live up to what you deserve.
I’ve never been enough for anyone, even you.

You deserve all the great things.
The biggest heart I’ve ever met.
I’d give it all for you.
Unlike anyone else.

————————–

This isn’t goodbye.
This is see you later.

I can’t do this.
Everything you know is here.
I can’t do this.
I’m sorry.

There are things you don’t understand.
You don’t want to move.

I’m not worthy.
It’s not my choice.
You don’t understand.

————————–

The silence to the noise.
The lies to the truth.
The stillness in the chaos.

My Gravity

From the first embrace,
I felt calm like a flowing creek.
The conversations ran deeper
Than the deepest unexplored oceans.
A connection that pulled me in
Stronger than the Earth’s gravity.
The first touch of your hand
Felt like an electrical shock
That ran deep in my soul.
The first smile that radiated
Like the sun in the summer.
A kiss so magnetic
It pulled together polar opposites.
Lost in ecstasy so high
I lost myself in another realm.

Reconnecting felt like floating.
In a calming river surrounded by nature.
Security is stronger than the purest diamond.
The first twirl and dance together
Was freeing and full of pure elation.
The breeze blew through my hair.
As you wrapped your arms around me.
We strolled through the streets
like time didn’t exist.
The stare from your eyes is so intense
Feeling like a cracked dam ready to burst.
I yearned for you and you for me
Like the tide of the ocean for the moon.
Watching you smile and play
Like a newborn learning happiness.
You pulled me close
And my head falls back in joy.
The instant connection
Like stars in a constellation.
Watching you was like
Watching a warrior winning ground:
Strength, determination,
Pride, and fearless.

You pull me in
Fitting like a piece of a puzzle:
The perfect fit, completing each other.
Pulsing euphoria with your embrace.
Taking risks greater than
Climbing Mt. Everest,
But I felt safe…
Safer than I ever felt in my life,
Even more than a baby in a womb.
Staring intensely into your eyes
Watching the stories build inside.
Your hands wrap around me
Engulfing me like the ocean and land.
I craved you like the need for oxygen
And you me like a body needs a heart.
Nothing ever felt so perfect and so right.


I lost myself completely without trying.
My mind is traveling to worlds
Of pure divinity.
I fall into you, losing myself
Like a glove with no hand.
And lie on your chest
Listening to your calming heartbeat
Making music like famous composers.
Feeling your chest rise and fall
Like shadows with the sunrise and sunset.
Your arm wrapped around me like the most secure blanket.
Your lips on my forehead as soft
As snow settles on the ground:
Calming, quiet, and soft, building a new life.
Waking up, feeling you care for me
Like the sun caring for natural life.
Aching the separation that’s to come
Like fault lines breaking the land.
Wishing time could still,
like water turning to ice,
Just to keep this moment.

The yearn and need deeper than
A desert needing rain.
I beg that life will bring you back
Like the phases of the moon:
returning with a steady pace.

You changed me
Like a compass next to iron.
And I’ll never be the same
Like ash becoming part of soil.

And I’ll disappear at your request
But long for you like an unlocked
Door in an abandoned building.
And I’ll keep trying to pull away
Failing because you’re my gravity.

I’m Fine (But Not Okay)

Verse 1
The morning air feels like winter now,
Another day of numb feeling.
A smile appears when I allow
All it does is keep concealing.

People say I’m strong,
But they don’t see what I hide.
I’ve been breaking all along,
Still, I push these feelings aside.

Chorus
I’m fine, but not okay,
It’s a facade I portray.
I’ll make it, I always do,
No matter how much it breaks me in two.
I’m fine, which is what I’ll say,
But inside I fade away.
I’ll keep playing in this game show,
Because surviving’s all I know.

Verse 2
The mirror shows a ghost,
Eyes really tell the truth.
But deep down, the truth haunts,
Fighting my internal thoughts.

Hope’s a flame slowly withering away,
But still burning in some way.
Every night I take a deep breath,
As I wait for my sudden death.

Chorus
I’m fine, but not okay,
It’s a facade I portray.
I’ll make it, I always do,
No matter how much it breaks me in two.
I’m fine, which is what I’ll say,
But inside, I fade away.
I’ll keep playing in this game show,
Because surviving’s all I know.

Bridge
And maybe someday I’ll feel light,
When the thoughts don’t make me want to fight.
But till, I’ll play pretend,
Smile through storms that never end.

Chorus
I’m fine, but not okay,
It’s a facade I portray.
I’ll make it, I always do,
No matter how much it breaks me in two.
I’m fine, which is what I’ll say,
But inside, I fade away.
I’ll keep playing in this game show,
Because surviving’s all I know.

Outro
I’m fine…
But not okay.

Leasing Love On A Whim

(Verse 1)
You let me go like it was nothing at all,
Missed out on the long haul.
Crashing down like a tsunami wave,
But I rebuilt my world on better days.
Now you’re scrolling through the faded frame,
Wondering who is the flame
You traded depth for something that is broken
Now you feel the echo of words never spoken.

(Pre-Chorus)
You took something that was familiar
Just remember, second place is silver.
I’m steady where you found me fragile and free
Guess absence taught you what you couldn’t see.

(Chorus)
You gave me up and now you miss us
All because you were treasonous
I’m careful now, not leasing love on a whim.
I’m moved on, holding love only within
All you said was just empty words
I’m still the one you prefer
Now you dream of me late at night
While I’m living it up in the pale moonlight

(Verse 2)
You chase the easy thrill, but at what cost?
Upon your heart I have embossed.
You’re calling through the noise,
I’ll maintain my poise
I held my ground, you had the best
Now your heart is feeling suppressed
You send a message dressed in second thoughts,
Thinking gestures can stitch what time forgot.

(Bridge)
Regret’s a slow and honest kind of ache,
It shows up late and asks for one more break.
What are the chances of it happening again?
I think about it every now and then.

(Chorus)
You gave me up and now you miss us
All because you were treasonous
I’m careful now, not leasing love on a whim.
I’m moved on, holding love only within
All you said was just empty words
I’m still the one you prefer
Now you dream of me late at night
While I’m living it up in the pale moonlight

(Outro)
So come with better words than longing and luck
Don’t come around when you’re moonstruck.
I’m not a rescue or a safety net to mend the cracks
I want it all—not something that lacks.