introspective poetry

Indifference

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

I’ll never leave you.
You’re unlike anyone else.

I’ll wait forever for you.
I’m coming back.
Never leaving your side.
This is as special as you.
Be in my life forever.

I bought it for you,
I’d never live up to what you deserve.
I’ve never been enough for anyone, even you.

You deserve all the great things.
The biggest heart I’ve ever met.
I’d give it all for you.
Unlike anyone else.

————————–

This isn’t goodbye.
This is see you later.

I can’t do this.
Everything you know is here.
I can’t do this.
I’m sorry.

There are things you don’t understand.
You don’t want to move.

I’m not worthy.
It’s not my choice.
You don’t understand.

————————–

The silence to the noise.
The lies to the truth.
The stillness in the chaos.

My Gravity

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

From the first embrace,
I felt calm like a flowing creek.
The conversations ran deeper
Than the deepest unexplored oceans.
A connection that pulled me in
Stronger than the Earth’s gravity.
The first touch of your hand
Felt like an electrical shock
That ran deep in my soul.
The first smile that radiated
Like the sun in the summer.
A kiss so magnetic
It pulled together polar opposites.
Lost in ecstasy so high
I lost myself in another realm.

Reconnecting felt like floating.
In a calming river surrounded by nature.
Security is stronger than the purest diamond.
The first twirl and dance together
Was freeing and full of pure elation.
The breeze blew through my hair.
As you wrapped your arms around me.
We strolled through the streets
like time didn’t exist.
The stare from your eyes is so intense
Feeling like a cracked dam ready to burst.
I yearned for you and you for me
Like the tide of the ocean for the moon.
Watching you smile and play
Like a newborn learning happiness.
You pulled me close
And my head falls back in joy.
The instant connection
Like stars in a constellation.
Watching you was like
Watching a warrior winning ground:
Strength, determination,
Pride, and fearless.

You pull me in
Fitting like a piece of a puzzle:
The perfect fit, completing each other.
Pulsing euphoria with your embrace.
Taking risks greater than
Climbing Mt. Everest,
But I felt safe…
Safer than I ever felt in my life,
Even more than a baby in a womb.
Staring intensely into your eyes
Watching the stories build inside.
Your hands wrap around me
Engulfing me like the ocean and land.
I craved you like the need for oxygen
And you me like a body needs a heart.
Nothing ever felt so perfect and so right.


I lost myself completely without trying.
My mind is traveling to worlds
Of pure divinity.
I fall into you, losing myself
Like a glove with no hand.
And lie on your chest
Listening to your calming heartbeat
Making music like famous composers.
Feeling your chest rise and fall
Like shadows with the sunrise and sunset.
Your arm wrapped around me like the most secure blanket.
Your lips on my forehead as soft
As snow settles on the ground:
Calming, quiet, and soft, building a new life.
Waking up, feeling you care for me
Like the sun caring for natural life.
Aching the separation that’s to come
Like fault lines breaking the land.
Wishing time could still,
like water turning to ice,
Just to keep this moment.

The yearn and need deeper than
A desert needing rain.
I beg that life will bring you back
Like the phases of the moon:
returning with a steady pace.

You changed me
Like a compass next to iron.
And I’ll never be the same
Like ash becoming part of soil.

And I’ll disappear at your request
But long for you like an unlocked
Door in an abandoned building.
And I’ll keep trying to pull away
Failing because you’re my gravity.

Deprived

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

Deprived of air when drowning,
unable to comprehend the feeling.
Thoughts dancing in your head, shouting,
leaving you reeling.

Deprived of being truly sated,
you craved from the moment we met.
Now you’re left feeling sedated,
living with daily thoughts of regret.

You need me like fish need water,
like humans need oxygen.
Now your heart is going through slaughter,
wishing to see me once again.

I was everything you dreamed of,
but now you’re deprived.
I was your soul tie, twin flame love,
and I’m not sure it can be revived.

She Was Rare

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

Like a red diamond on display,
admired from a distance.
Waiting for the day to break away,
but keep getting met with resistance.

My heart smoothed with Vantablack,
looking empty, but filled with just.
Waiting for it to be swept back,
but constantly filled with cosmic dust.

A total eclipse happening once,
hiding behind the facade.
Hiding behind all fronts,
despite being attractive like a lightning rod.

Ancient Roman concrete,
where stories lie.
Never admitting to defeat,
building strength, and intensifying.

Silence of the mind,
an impossible task.
Coming undone, unconfined,
finally showing what’s under the mask.

Hardly touched, like lunar rocks,
spoken of but rarely experienced.
Can’t contain like Pandora’s Box,
once experienced like an euphoriant.

Her love was like a natural pearl,
wild, free, but hardly produced.
But she cried for it to be unfurled,
but it becomes rarer as it is reduced.

An amber with no imperfections,
hard to find, but so divine.
Never receiving reciprocal affections,
but often seen on others’ shrine.

A single snowflake drifting in,
unlike any other you’ll ever find.
Feeling the regret deep within,
all because he was blind.

The Mona Lisa, appreciated too late,
was a force that imprinted deep.
One that you cannot recreate,
but you’ll dream about her in your sleep.

A fingerprint on the heart,
no one will compare to her.
You’ll regret the day of depart,
she was the rarest thing to occur.

Leasing Love On A Whim

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

(Verse 1)
You let me go like it was nothing at all,
Missed out on the long haul.
Crashing down like a tsunami wave,
But I rebuilt my world on better days.
Now you’re scrolling through the faded frame,
Wondering who is the flame
You traded depth for something that is broken
Now you feel the echo of words never spoken.

(Pre-Chorus)
You took something that was familiar
Just remember, second place is silver.
I’m steady where you found me fragile and free
Guess absence taught you what you couldn’t see.

(Chorus)
You gave me up and now you miss us
All because you were treasonous
I’m careful now, not leasing love on a whim.
I’m moved on, holding love only within
All you said was just empty words
I’m still the one you prefer
Now you dream of me late at night
While I’m living it up in the pale moonlight

(Verse 2)
You chase the easy thrill, but at what cost?
Upon your heart I have embossed.
You’re calling through the noise,
I’ll maintain my poise
I held my ground, you had the best
Now your heart is feeling suppressed
You send a message dressed in second thoughts,
Thinking gestures can stitch what time forgot.

(Bridge)
Regret’s a slow and honest kind of ache,
It shows up late and asks for one more break.
What are the chances of it happening again?
I think about it every now and then.

(Chorus)
You gave me up and now you miss us
All because you were treasonous
I’m careful now, not leasing love on a whim.
I’m moved on, holding love only within
All you said was just empty words
I’m still the one you prefer
Now you dream of me late at night
While I’m living it up in the pale moonlight

(Outro)
So come with better words than longing and luck
Don’t come around when you’re moonstruck.
I’m not a rescue or a safety net to mend the cracks
I want it all—not something that lacks.

The Crow’s Probe

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

(Verse 1)
I woke beside the heavy tomb,
A whisper left, impending doom.
Your scent still haunts the bitter air,
But you’re found nowhere.

They said love dies, but it’s a decree
It burns like a burn in third degree
I flew through the graves of what we were,
Digging for truth in the dirt and blur.

(Pre-Chorus)
Every heartbeat you caused to leap
I unearth in the places buried deep

(Chorus)
I’m the crow in distress
Pecking at the lies, I have to assess
Your ghost still lingers in my bones,
As I reminisce at the gravestone
Love’s not gone, it’s just transformed
Cold and black, just like the great storm.

(Verse 2)
Your eyes were candles in the storm,
Now hollow glass that won’t stay warm.
I trace the crime of love’s last breath,
Every touch, a clue to death.

I follow trails of broken tales,
Your voice in the wind, your scent in trails
In the ruin, I found your memory,
Written in soot, like an abandoned penitentiary.

(Pre-Chorus)
You taught me how to live with this bloodstain
Now I wear your memory like a rugged terrain.

(Chorus)
I’m the crow that is in distress
Pecking at the lies, I have to assess
Your ghost still lingers in my bones,
As I reminisce at the gravestone
Love’s not gone, it’s just transformed
Cold and black, just like the great storm.

(Bridge)
Do you feel me in your afterglow?
Does it take you in with the undertow?
I found the heart you buried deep,
It beats for me with a weep.

(Whispered)
I am your reckoning, your requiem’s ping
The truth is, I was your everything.

(Final Chorus)
I’m the crow in distress
Pecking at the lies, I have to assess
Our love’s a corpse that won’t decay,
It feeds the dark, it holds the deepest dismay.
Even the grave can’t make me forget
The crow still asks, “How is the regret?”

11/09/2025

Worse Than the Rest

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

(Verse 1)
You said you were nothing like rest,
So I decided to give it a try.
You mirrored everything I wanted,
And I was foolish to buy the lie.
You held my heart like fragile glass,
Then dropped it just to see it break.
I thought I’d learned from all the past,
But you were just a better fake.

(Pre-Chorus)
You played the part so well
Like love was your prize.
I saw the truth too late to swell,
The devil eyes tend to mesmorize.

(Chorus)
You said you’d be different,
Turns out you’re worse than the rest.
You lit a fire, watched it burn,
But it was all just in jest.
I thought you were healing,
But you’re another wound to mend.
You said you’d be different,
But you were worse in the end.

(Verse 2)
You made me believe in love again,
Just to leave me in the cold.
Every “I love you” that you whispered
Turned into black mold.
You manipulated to what I wanted to hear,
But your words were paper-thin.
You taught me love doesn’t exist,
It’s a battle I’ll never win.

(Pre-Chorus)
You had all of my heart,
Then burned it and let it smoke.
Another promise torn apart,
Another heart broke.

(Chorus)
You said you’d be different,
Turns out you’re worse than the rest.
You lit a fire, watched it burn,
But it was all just in jest.
I thought you were healing,
But you’re another wound to mend.
You said you’d be different,
But you were worse in the end.

(Bridge)
Now I see through your lies,
Through your acting and betrayal.
You broke me just to prove a point,
That good men fade to dust.
And now the only thing I trust
Is me, not love.

(Chorus)
You said you’d be different,
Turns out you’re worse than the rest.
You lit a fire, watched it burn,
But it was all just in jest.
I thought you were healing,
But you’re another wound to mend.
You said you’d be different,
But you were worse in the end.

(Outro)
You were never different,
You were just better at pretending to be.

Silent Watcher

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

Just linger in the shadows,
a ghost hidden away.
I’m the one you superpose,
And now feeling a sense of dismay.

You see the smiles I imprint on you,
and wonder how I’m doing so well,
when you thought I’d subdue.
It’s everything you dwell.

Now you live with my memory,
in the loudness of your quiet night.
Watching me like the best documentary,
Looking at it in hindsight.

You take what little’s left of me
in glances I didn’t give freely.
Waiting for me to make my plea,
while I show myself steely.

Does it drive you crazy?
Is this not what you expected?
Looking back, is it hazy?
Are you feeling rejected?

Engraving

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

Verse 1
You had gold in your hands,
But you let it slip through like the sands.
You turned your back while I soared
Now this cataclysmic love will never be restored.

You threw away the one thing you manifested
You were never fully invested.

Chorus
Now you’re standing in the ruins of maybe,
Wishing you’d fought when you still could’ve saved me.
Found something so pristine
You’re haunted by what I mean.
It’s too late for amazing
You’ll be left with this engraving

Verse 2
Mistook my kindness for desperation
When really I was your only salvation
Now the heavens forever cry for you
Because you threw away something true.

Now every memory and echo calls my name,
And you finally feel the heat of the flame.

Chorus
Now you’re standing in the ruins of maybe,
Wishing you’d fought when you still could’ve saved me.
Found something so pristine
You’re haunted by what I mean.
It’s too late for amazing
You’ll be left with this engraving

Bridge
I was the prize you let go
You’ll never experience the afterglow
Lost in your own misery
What we had is history

Chorus
Now you’re standing in the ruins of maybe,
Wishing you’d fought when you still could’ve saved me.
Found something so pristine
You’re haunted by what I mean.
It’s too late for amazing
You’ll be left with this engraving

10/28/2025

Chalk Lessons

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

I once drew hearts in sidewalk chalk,
believing it symbolized lasting love.
Each crush gone as fast as it came.
Each scar a self-inflicted game,
till rain washed away the chalk.

You were my admiration,
a storybook I tried to publish.
But limerence taught me true beauty.
Love’s not lost, but instead a plea,
even when I crave fixation.

Now stronger, I walk tall.
The swings still hum, the laughs go on.
I hold the chalk with balanced hands.
And build my dreams on truer commands,
lessons that I shall forever recall.

10/27/2015

Even When I Knew

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

I knew it wouldn’t last.
You were lightning:
bright, wild, gone before I could catch.
And still, I stood in the storm
pretending it was enough.

I saw the ending like a shadow
waiting just behind your smile.
But, it still hurts.

Knowing
doesn’t make the loss any easier
it just makes me feel gullible
for hoping it’d be real,
for believing love could rewrite the laws of gravity and find me.

Now I’m left with ghosts of what would never be,
playing memories like they’re proof
that something real once tried to exist.

And I keep asking myself
why I miss a dagger
that was always meant to kill me.

10/26/2025

Confined Heart

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

Love once blossomed in my chest,
soft as morning light on grass.
Now it feels deeply oppressed
Withering away in the hourglass.

The air hums with what we were,
a tune that turns my stomach and makes me ache
Wishing I could turn you into a blur,
hoping each day I never wake.

My body reacts to the pain,
cutting deep into the abyss.
It was I that you slain,
yet, still, I will never remiss.

Permanent mark in my mind,
wishing I could expunge.
Daily fighting of feeling confined,
into the darkness I plunge.

10/26/2025

Abandoned House

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

A house that once hummed with life
Windows that shone with happiness and sunlight in every room
Now, all it contains is the afterlife
The house, which is now entombed
A porch swing swaying in lonely guise

Floorboards groan, and echoes of steps and laughter
Paint peeling like forgotten promises
of a life that was ever-after
Memories flooding like hostages
Screaming to escape the haunting cries

Even in decay, the house won’t let go
Spirits roam through the memories
Wishing they could all forego
All the promises from the centuries
That now just agonize

Abandoned and left behind to wither away
Forgotten like a letter in the bottom drawer
Broken, shattered, and fallen, windows dismay
Its purpose forgotten forevermore
A hallway dark, where light denies

People walk by and wait for the demolition
For the abandoned house, vacant and forgotten
A stairway collapsed in sad submission
Fireplace cold, embers rotten
A rusty keyhole that no one pries

10/20/2025

Concrete Wings

Angel BoucherLeave a comment

There was light that was revoked
Shattered are all my dreams

Now I sit in silence with the noises in my head
Fighting the demons eating me inside out
Sense tells me to thrust ahead
But the self hate thrashes about

Wings flapping, trying to break free
Cemented onto the ground crying out pleas
Nipping at the fruit of the poisonous tree
The whip of the wind feeling absentee

I spread my wings to take flight
Only to fall and fail
Everything in me feels like darkest night
I can never prevail

So here I stand-helpless and broke
Stuck with concrete wings

10/20/2025