What Night Gave Me

Night screams terrors in my head
of the monsters that came to destroy me
terrorizing me to leave me hanging by a thread
never realizing the impact Night had on me for eternity

vast ruminating memories of isolation
surrounded by Night, but not embraced
waiting for me to give up in resignation
Night left behind and waiting to be chased

little did it know, despite the darkness looming
was going to bring me strength that was unimaginable
and now Night is the one all-consuming
thinking of how I am unbreakable

the sounds and visions of nightmares past
come creeping up, whispering delusions in my mind
trying to paint such a dark overcast
as I choose to ignore and play blind

Night reminds me of its supernatural vision
as I wander through the unknowns, begging for clarity
only when I’m at a breaking point, I make the incision
to give myself the life of polarity

Night is the epitome of the unknown
unable to navigate through the continuous maze
trying to take over the feeling of home
as I overtake the throne in a new phase

no longer hidden, the Night collapses
no longer alone, but no one is needed
Night tries to enter again in relapses
and soon Night will have conceded

thanks to Night I am what I’ve become
the silence of burden no longer in my hands
so long the feeling of being numb
because my life is what Night wished it commands

braver than any childhood scarring
the warrior stands in front of Night, ready for battle
ready for a strong sparring
and I’ll leave Night battered and scattered

appreciate the night for all of the aches
for it is what causes the shine of the day
despite all of the internal quakes
it is I who will always stay

I’m Fine (But Not Okay)

Verse 1
The morning air feels like winter now,
Another day of numb feeling.
A smile appears when I allow
All it does is keep concealing.

People say I’m strong,
But they don’t see what I hide.
I’ve been breaking all along,
Still, I push these feelings aside.

Chorus
I’m fine, but not okay,
It’s a facade I portray.
I’ll make it, I always do,
No matter how much it breaks me in two.
I’m fine, which is what I’ll say,
But inside I fade away.
I’ll keep playing in this game show,
Because surviving’s all I know.

Verse 2
The mirror shows a ghost,
Eyes really tell the truth.
But deep down, the truth haunts,
Fighting my internal thoughts.

Hope’s a flame slowly withering away,
But still burning in some way.
Every night I take a deep breath,
As I wait for my sudden death.

Chorus
I’m fine, but not okay,
It’s a facade I portray.
I’ll make it, I always do,
No matter how much it breaks me in two.
I’m fine, which is what I’ll say,
But inside, I fade away.
I’ll keep playing in this game show,
Because surviving’s all I know.

Bridge
And maybe someday I’ll feel light,
When the thoughts don’t make me want to fight.
But till, I’ll play pretend,
Smile through storms that never end.

Chorus
I’m fine, but not okay,
It’s a facade I portray.
I’ll make it, I always do,
No matter how much it breaks me in two.
I’m fine, which is what I’ll say,
But inside, I fade away.
I’ll keep playing in this game show,
Because surviving’s all I know.

Outro
I’m fine…
But not okay.